Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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