yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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