i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
