I'm gonna have a badass scar
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize