its not stalking. its research.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Randomize
