so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize