Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
