Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
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