he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Randomize
