ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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