She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
Randomize
