Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
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