she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
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