guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
i came on her dog
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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