I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
