get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
