Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
