Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
