Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
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