i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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