Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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