dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
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