You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
