i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
