I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize