I think im going to throw up on grandma
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
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