angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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