my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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