Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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