No stitches, just platelets and will power
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
