why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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