btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
