we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
