I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
