jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
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she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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