Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.

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(816): View more from Missouri

About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.

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(707): View more from California

OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.

(1-707): View more from California

Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.

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(03): View more from

you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!

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(206): View more from Washington

i want to swaddle you in tequila

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(805): View more from California

Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke

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(563): View more from Iowa

Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.

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(540): View more from Virginia

I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with

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