Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Randomize
