If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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