there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize