is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
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