pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
