By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
