I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
It's never too late to be topless.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
