in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize