Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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