I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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