ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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