i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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