did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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