Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(404): View more from Georgia

she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.

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(703): View more from Virginia

She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am

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(618): View more from Illinois

I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.

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Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(785): View more from Kansas

I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man

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(619): View more from California

Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head

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(615): View more from Tennessee

I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister

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(864): View more from South Carolina

Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.

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