is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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