It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
