His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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